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I am beyond recognition now.

If you were to look at me, you would run and scream in horror. I’ve been going to bed early but I keep waking up tired. Like I’ve been running a marathon or something. Truth is, I probably was and my dreams ain’t helping me much.

In my dreams lately, all I do is run. Running for my life that is. My room is constantly invaded. I have strange things, objects or some sort of life creature in my room, always searching and threatens to reveal my presence to their terrifying man-eating superiors. I am never safe, where ever I go. I have murderers after me. I have rapists who seduces then kills. I became a cannibal unintentionally when I ate a murdered victim and was told that it was venison during this posh dinner with aristocrats. I was chased by monsters and ghouls with my guts spilling out. I witnessed a gruesome killing and I was alone.

Despite it being a dream and all, it felt so real and every night it’s always the same plot.

What I wouldn’t give to just sleep deeply and soundly without all that to interfere with my mental health. What I wouldn’t give to go on a holiday too because once again, I really really need a holiday bad.

Su Chin and Yao Han, can you please, please, please just take me with you?!!!!

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